Father and Baby in Swimming Pool


Dear Son, The shape of families has changed rapidly over the last three hundred years or so.  Our cultures has changed and is changing so much over the years that what is true about the shape of a family in one generation won’t be true for another. For many fathers in the past couple of […]

laughing boy

Life Lessons

Dear Son, The other day I reminded myself that these letters don’t all have to be brilliant, deep, or spiritual affairs.  Sometimes they can be light, peaceful, or just plain fun. Today I am just going to share with you fourteen rules I keep in mind in my life, as much to make me laugh […]

Drips, by Hans

Rainy Days

Dear Son, It’s a dim and rainy day today.  I am sitting on the living room couch in an apartment I don’t think you’ll ever remember, even though it will be your first home.  Your mother is at the dining room table working away at important school material.  It’s quiet and cool, aside from the […]

boy watching the rain

Idea-People and People-People

Dear Son, Many of my posts over the past couple of weeks have been political to some extent or another. I sometimes can be a bit boorish: I like talking about and thinking about the political… But the truth is that while politics are somewhat important, they are also boring as hell! The world is […]

Martin Luther King Jr.

Good, Evil, and Racism

Dear Son, A lot of people today don’t believe in the idea that Good and Evil are real things.  They see them as just being words use to manipulate the masses.  They would rather imagine that the fairness or equality should be the ultimate measures of what is right or wrong. This moral relativism is incredibly toxic.  It […]

Clasped Hands

Everybody Wins

One of the biggest mistakes people make these days is to assume that life has winners and losers, and that to win, other people have to lose. Life is no zero-sum game. If we all treat each other with basic respect and dignity, the everyone gets to win. Losing is something that happens in games, […]

Laughing Boy


Dear Son, I have a pretty unusual take on feelings.  One that is at the core of my work.  And it is one I sure hope that I can teach you, because it has made my life a lot better for holding it. Feelings are fleeting:  They start involuntary – we all feel angry, sad, […]


A Few Manly Skills

Dear Son, There are a few little things that every Man ought to know how to do.  Little things that I know I am going to love teaching you: To whittle. To catch a fish. To clean and dress a wound. To barbecue a steak. To shave with an actual razor. To fix a power […]